The "Make it Happen" Challenge.

Is it a bird? It is a plane? No silly it's "Make it Happen", the crowd-sourcing challenge to see if my big ideas can come to fruition thanks to the rich community of creatives, writers, artists, designers, inventors, scientists, architects, pharmacologists, techies, provocateurs, ethicists, military contractors, etc.

MIH Brief 013

OBJECTIVE:

Create a feature film that borrows from the real life incarceration of Lindsay Lohan. The movie can be fictitious or factual.

Today is Lindsey Lohan's forth day behind bars as she serves a 90 sentence for probation violations stemming from a drug incident way back in 2006. It's an all too familiar tale of a spoiled, self-destructive, less than bright uber talent getting into serious trouble, but that's not our concern. The important thing is that one crazy starlet's misfortune is many a film-maker's opportunity of a lifetime.

The prison genre was once a vibrant staple of the American film goer's diet with such tasty classics as "Cool Hand Luke", "Papillon", "Midnight Express", "The Longest Yard", "The Shawshank Redemption", "Escape from Alcatraz", "Kiss of the Spider Woman" and "Caged Heat". Okay maybe not "Caged Heat", but what an extraordinary sample.

Unfortunately the genre has inexplicably gotten stale, if it hasn't dropped off the menu altogether. Can you think of a decent prison movie from the last couple of years? Didn't think do.

But now thanks to Lohan's conviction and the media spotlight on prisons there may be a golden opportunity to breathe new life into this dying genre. 

THOUGHT STARTERS:

  -  Let's start with the obvious. How about the "The Lohan Redemption", a remake of Frank Darabont's classic? Instead of the smart, savvy banker convicted of killing his wife, we have a spoiled, self-destructive, less than bright yet uber talented Hollywood starlet convicted of probation violations. Lindsay Lohan would play herself, hence the title. Like Andy Dufresne she would never lose hope, but instead of a real escape, hers would be more metaphorical, i.e. she finds a way to escape her demons. Queen Latifa could feminize Morgan Freeman's character, Red. We call her Dusty.

  -  A Tyler Perry written, directed and produced comedy might just rule the box office. Could we build a story around a spoiled, self-destructive, less than bright yet uber talented Hollywood starlet who becomes a black Muslim, or rather a white black Muslim while serving jail time for probation violations. When she is released she returns home much to the horror of her family and friends. Hilarity ensues. Tyler Perry will play the cell-mate who introduces her to Islam.
  -  How about a brutal revenge drama, "The Rape of Locklear"? Alice Locklear is a spoiled, self-destructive, less than bright yet uber talented Hollywood starlet who is convicted of probation violations. While serving time in jail she is brutally raped by other prisoners as well as the sadistic prison warden. The trauma is so severe that when she is released she embarks on a bloody journey of vengeance that doesn't stop until she has visited retribution on everyone who has raped her in her life. You see being raped in jail wasn't the first time. By the end her surprising victims include her agent, two producers, her parents, her therapist, her high-school guidance councillor and the probation officer who fitted the monitoring device on her ankle. This would be a N-17 release.
  -  John Walters style comedy anyone? In "Traveling panties of the Aryan Sisterhood", Rose Petals is an FBI agent who goes undercover as a spoiled, self-destructive, less than bright yet uber talented Hollywood starlet convicted of probation violations. Her assignment is to infiltrate the Aryan Sisterhood while in jail and bust a major white slave ring that they are running from the inside.
  -  Is there an opportunity for a musical? "The Jailbirds" could be the inspiring story of how music brings together three lost souls from different walks of life. There is a black Muslim, an Aryan sister and a spoiled, self-destructive, less than bright yet uber talented Hollywood starlet who is convicted of probation violations.
  -  Then there's this. When a spoiled, self-destructive, less than bright yet uber talented Hollywood starlet is convicted of probation violations she has to share a prison cell with the spoiled, self-destructive, less than bright yet no talent daughter of a financial tycoon. Imagine the possibilities!
 

MANDATORIES:

  -  There must be a lesbian shower scene between some of the prisoners.
  -  Any scenes of escape must be scored by Giorgio Moroder.
  -  The prison warden must have a thick southern accent.
  -  A prisoner only a few days from release must die.

Good luck and make it happen, people!